fingered.
well, the good news is that i am so well-liked at my job that i can just not show up for two days in a row and all they do when i come in the next day is smile and say "paul... weren't you supposed to be here?" and i get all puppy-dog and say "yeah..." and then they just shake their head and grin at me like i'm their newborn and i just won a Pulitzer, but i'm still peeing in their face as they change my shit-caked, soiled diaper.
maybe that's my problem. i must have some super power that enables me to not get in trouble. that's quite a talent. maybe the fantastic 4 should make room for me and we could be the fabulous 5. when attacked i would just pucker my lips a bit and get that wistful, innocent look in my eye, and say "please don't hurt us..."
won't anyone backhand me? how am i supposed to learn?
paul flunks out of college, he gets sympathy.
paul drives into the side of the house, he gets "oh, paul."
paul gets drunk at his cousin's birthday party, tears the toiletseat off of the toilet and flings it into the backyard, then he passes out on top of the dining room table. he gets a thank-you card for coming.
where is my comeuppance? what makes me so fucking likable?
and people wonder why i thank my family for not shooting me in the face. wouldn't you?
maybe that's my problem. i must have some super power that enables me to not get in trouble. that's quite a talent. maybe the fantastic 4 should make room for me and we could be the fabulous 5. when attacked i would just pucker my lips a bit and get that wistful, innocent look in my eye, and say "please don't hurt us..."
won't anyone backhand me? how am i supposed to learn?
paul flunks out of college, he gets sympathy.
paul drives into the side of the house, he gets "oh, paul."
paul gets drunk at his cousin's birthday party, tears the toiletseat off of the toilet and flings it into the backyard, then he passes out on top of the dining room table. he gets a thank-you card for coming.
where is my comeuppance? what makes me so fucking likable?
and people wonder why i thank my family for not shooting me in the face. wouldn't you?
posted by paultoes at 4:45 PM
6 Comments:
Paul makes lewd comments on my blog and I say fuck you bastard on his.
jesus christ, scott. at least when i say nasty things they relate in some way to the post, you fucking amateur. beyond that, if i say anything bad about you, that means i care about you. duh. i thought you were familiar with my backwards brain.
Well, if you really like I could get super mad at you for something. I am good at it.
I don't like you all that much, to tell the truth.
Feel better?
I do have Rob's website still:
ziggyslounge.blogspot.com
Hey to my buddy Paul. Wow - my first comment here at your fabulous site. I think your luck with not being held accountable for much (and being so "fucking likeable" as you say it) is that you're just so damn cute and innocent (and it makes me sick)!! Cute people always get away with more just because you can't get upset with them. It's like a societal thing, I think. :) In any event - embrace and enjoy it...because you can. It's a good thing...I really do like your site - and will likely link here if you're OK with that.
~Rob
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